Old and new… again

When your current struggles are less than your previous struggles…

And you still sometimes have to sit and count your blessings…

Comparing them to the progress you’ve made… 

When certain movies make you crying mad.. 

When your discontent momentarily overwhelms  your joy… 

When you absolutely must blast some music from old play lists…

 to drown out the nagging little voice in your head that keeps trying to rise above a whisper

 “you could do better, do more”. 

When your work ethic and the needs of your pain filled body conflict. 

 When your children say .. “it’s ok mom, we understand” 

and they shouldn’t have to anymore. 

 When people in your life, just by being their true selves, drag you down and back… 

and you wonder if maybe you’d be better off on your own again… 
But… I’m still ok.  Life is hard but I’m still strong. .

 

I’m quiet and contemplative much of the time… little by little working things out in my head and making plans … plans for a bright future… it’s just moving a little sideways and slower than I’d like. 

As I crawl into bed tonight my head filled with a days accumulation of “stuff and things”

This…

This brings me peace.

Old lady dog and new pup…

Blacksheep 

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Sunday Morning Cow Church

Bonnie gave me a fabulous late birthday present on Friday morning…
A beautiful 99% white heifer
She is the calf that almost wasn’t. .
When I got to the barn Bonnie had been in labor for a while… I watched her for a while and one little foot and a nose popped out and slid back in… so I scrubbed up and went in after the calf.. one leg was wedged under Bonnie’s pelvis. .. with a little rearranging I got both feet forward and 15 seconds later I got a wide eyed face plopping into my arms.
She is full of spunk and spirit.

It is my pleasure to introduce to you..
~My daughter wants to name her marshmallow. lol.~
My little almost ghost heifer.
Adele

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“good Job Bonnie, she was worth waiting for.”

Sunday Morning Cow Church

Sunday morning cow church
Well… where is my birthday baby!?
My Bonnie girl says “when I’m done baking it and not a moment sooner”
…ok, I guess I’ll wait.

15439830_1370682652956371_3734774522369269592_nUdder Devotion…  blacksheep the dairy farmer

Fresh Hot Apple Pie kinda happy

I had all but forgotten how much I love to bake..

baking pie.. cooking soup..my daughter singing and dancing in my kitchen.. dogs lounging quietly, Puppy sleeping in a kids lap.. and a peace in my heart..

This kind of happy.. is why I left.. and what we all need more of..

Black Sheep

life lesson

I think one of the best things a mom can teach her daughters is

“If you love flowers.. go pick them.. don’t wait for anyone else to bring beauty and peace and love into your life”

My little girl is a good flower picker..

Black Sheep.. ( lucky. happy. black sheep )

It REALLY does not have to be compilcated

Take the baby of the reluctant Mama.

BRING said baby in the Milking Parlor.

Reluctant Mama.. will easily and happily bring herself in and line up..

I accomplished in 2 minutes..
what 4 big guys could not manage in an hour last night..
MOMS always go where baby goes..
(..”sigh..”)

LOL  I swear she had something to say..

“I’ll hold her.. you slap that milker on so we can all get outa here”

and that is exactly what we did.. lol

More tomorrow..

Black Sheep